'I’ve had a struggle with mental health battles for a good number of years. That’s come from self-doubt. I didn’t believe I was good enough, or worth anything. It developed into suicidal ideation. I just wanted to give up. I tried a number of times to kill myself.

‘It was really an isolating experience. I believed that the isolation was real, when it wasn’t. I felt that I didn’t matter.

‘Isaiah 55.10-13 has made a difference for me. At the end, it says, “Instead of the thornbush will grow the juniper, and instead of briers the myrtle will grow.” I felt a sense of peace from this, that I didn’t have to strive. I didn’t have to accomplish the things that the Bible talks about. I saw that God was achieving them through me.

‘How’s my mental health now? It’s been little by little change. Listening to God’s truth, rather than the truth that I have had in my head has really helped. Listening to what God says about me, in this verse, has really helped.

‘There’s a great sense of being chosen. God has been deliberate in choosing me. You can see the purpose in that passage about why God reaches out to people. That’s vanquished the lie that’s been in my head that I had no purpose.

‘Whereas before, mental health struggles were the main thing going around in my head, and during the depression years the inner dialogue was complete self-doubt and self-worth, now it’s almost like that has really shrunk. It is there some days. Some days I feel down. But I’ve discovered more of a strength in the people around me, in God’s strength, because God has chosen me. He wants me to be alive still.

‘The voice that used to be so loud in my head is now a very little, quiet voice and I can talk to it and say, “You are not right.”'

If you are struggling with your mental health or feeling low during the coronavirus lockdown, please talk to someone and check out this helpful advice from Samaritans.

Do you have a story to share? Email mybible@biblesociety.org.uk

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